Thursday, May 1, 2008

Just not ready....

As many of may know, Francesca still is not potty trained. It has been a "subject" in our household for some time now and we have tried everything...with no success. This past weekend, we tackled the issue again (using some different techniques) and by Tuesday, Francesca and I were both at the end of our ropes. Now, don't get me wrong, I know that this isn't easy for a lot of children and families, but I never thought it would be this hard. After I had a melt down with my mom when she stopped by our house and she experienced first hand what was going on...she suggested I call her doctor. So that's exactly what I did...actually I called both her pediatrician and gastro doctor....and both said to stop the process immediately because she is just not ready. It was at that moment that I realized that it doesn't matter if she gets potty trained now or at a later time (when she is ready), but what matters is that she is happy and not stressing herself out (she was at the point of not wanting to eat or drink and holding both her pee and poop...she is one strong willed little girl!). So with the doctors' help and suggestions, we are starting a new process to help her understand more about going on the potty and why it is important that she does....on her own time. According to the 'schedule' that they agreed on, it should take about three months...starting with making the bathroom the only changing place...and should end by with her asking to go on the potty, willingly. We shall see how this works, but after trying almost everything, it is worth giving it a shot. When I explained to Francesca that we were no longer going to be putting her on the potty for a some time, she just looked at me and said, "I'm sorry." At that, I just grabbed my little girl into my arms and held her so close telling her the whole time, "You have nothing to be sorry for...you are just not ready." And with that...we are starting again a whole new process of potty training that allows her to go at her pace without the stress.

(I'll keep you all posted on how she is doing...)

5 comments:

lindanuts said...

Every child is different. There is no sure plan other than just letting it happen. Buy those cute little frilly panties with the cartoon characters on them. Put them in her drawer with the promise that she will get to wear them when she is ready to potty like a big girl. Don't discuss it again and don't go with those gross terry cloth 'training pants'. Little girls just want to wear girly things.Mallory was 3 when she just decided one day to wear big girl panties and never had an accident. It has to be in their own time. You will suffer alot less if you just wait her out....

Janelle said...

awwwww....I got teary when I read that she was sorry. they really want to please!

Francesca is such a bright little girl - it'll happen when she's ready. lots of Chloe's friends are not done training yet.

I hope you take a little break before starting the new 'program'. And be sure to let us know when you have SUCCESS - we'll be cheering!!!

sara said...

Oh, Shell! I, too, got a little misty thinking of how bad Francesca must feel!! I think taking a break is a great idea. "The Experts" usually say they'll let US know when they are ready!!!!

Sue said...

So sorry to hear about the struggle with the potty training, but glad that you are taking a break and will have a new approach. We never had anyone give us a hard time, but J was 3y5m before she started to use it. And, she only just got rid of nighttime diapers a few months ago - just never would wake at night. So, hang in there. My ped said she's never had a patient go to college still in diapers!!! :0

Colleen said...

I realized with Olivia that not all children are ready at the same age. By the time I had Livi I was a potty training pro (so I thought). It took Livi until almost 4 to be ready. I promise she will get there.

By the way....tag your it! Stop by my blog for the rules....if you need to talk just give me a shout. I have been in your shoes a few times...it took my Tyler a long time to potty train...now at 17 years old....he no longer wears diapers : )